Dear ABBY: I was recently invited for a long weekend at my friend’s new house in South Carolina.
She has wanted me to come there to visit since she bought it. I offered to come down but then I sprained my ankle and it still hasn’t healed.
My friend then told me that her daughter and son-in-law will be there with their two young children. She said we can take care of her grandchildren while I’m there when her daughter and son-in-law go out.
I told her I don’t want to go down there to babysit. I don’t have children and I don’t like taking care of children.
She used to do this to me before she moved. Now she is upset that I won’t help her. What should I do? – NOT INTERESTED IN THE SOUTH
DEAR NOT INTERESTED: What you do is this: Repeat to your manipulative friend that your joint is still healing, it’s hard to move, and you’re disabled to follow young children.
Tell her that when you’re better, you’d love to check out her place and visit her one on one. Then stick to your guns.
Dear ABBY: I am a male singer and guitarist who has played in small local venues most of my life. My new duet partner is a nice person and a good multi-instrumentalist.
The problem is that he can’t – and shouldn’t – sing, although he believes he’s a good vocalist.
His new girlfriend recently confided in me that she thinks he shouldn’t be singing because it’s damaging to our mutual reputation and to myself as a musician. She doesn’t know how to tell him or if she should.
I don’t know how to tell him either without jeopardizing our partnership, though at this point, any gig we get will be alone due to the poor vocal performance that will result.
Over the years, I’ve failed auditions and learned from constructive criticism. Should I tell him or try to break up the two of us gently? – THE OLD CANADIAN ROCKER
Dear ROCKER: Your relationship with this partner is not social; IS BUsINEss. He is in denial about his disabilities.
Bursting his bubble by explaining that his singing is getting in your way won’t endear you to him.
It would be best to dissolve the partnership as gracefully as you can and find a replacement.
Dear ABBY: My parents are getting older and have a number of health problems. I am one of three children now in my 40s.
My parents got a lawyer to write their will and had completely removed a child. They decided to give two-thirds of their fortune to another child, leaving me only one-third.
They claim the reason is that my sister will be responsible for their health when and if they get to that point.
We’re not talking about a lot of money, but I don’t know what to do. – NOT PREFERRED IN MICHIGAN
DEAR NOT FAVORITE: What you should do is accept your parents’ reasoning, as well as their generosity, and not argue about it. Be grateful, because doing otherwise will get you nowhere.
Dear Abby was written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at DearAbby.com or PO Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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